Religion, Tribe and a lil thing known as Marriage

Recently, I met a guy and he seemed like a very interesting person. We started to hang out, and get to know each other better and I realised that he's a really cool person. So I now like this guy and he likes me too. Now this is where you ask, "what's the problem?" Well he is from a different tribe.

I'm sure you are wondering why this is an issue. Me personally, I am not tribalistic, but it seems my family might be a bit tribalistic. Not to an extreme point, but enough to make me wonder if anything could work out between me and this guy.

This got me thinking about some of the issues that cause problems in marriages. You have the issue of difference in culture. If this guy is from a different tribe, he has a different way of doing things, his family has different principles, they speak a different language, eat different food, etc.. This cultural gap in itself is enough to cause friction in a marriage between two different people.

If you then decided to add religious differences to it, you are playing another ball game. It's one thing if it's based on varying religions like Christianity and Islam. What happens when we now get into the craziness of denominations. Anglican, Catholic, Baptist, Methodist, etc.. Let's not even get into the various pentecostal churches; Redeemed, TREM, Winners, House on the Rock, Household of God, Daystar, Covenant Christian Centre, and the various other nameless churches. What does religion have to do with it anyway? As a Christian though, I know I can't be unequally yoked to an unbeliever, so let's permanently rule out marrying a Muslim. But should the fact that a guy is Catholic affect whether he is marriable (if that's a word) or not? I don't think so.

I think it comes down to basic facts. What character does he have? What principles does he live by, regardless of his tribe? What relationship does he have with God, regardless of his denomination?

Another issue now came to mind. What if he has a kid. These days, many young people have children already and yet they are not married. So does the fact that a person have a kid mean their chance at a future decent marriage is cut short? After all, it was just a mistake.

Now my mother explained a simple principle to me. If a person has done something once before, the probability of them doing it again is higher. So if a man had sex with a woman before, the probability of him having sex with her again is higher. So if your man has a child by another woman, the chances of him sleeping with said woman again is higher. Hmm. This is a lot to process.

Anyway, these are just a few thoughts going through my mind.

Despite all these issues, I believe that if 2 people are meant to be together, they will be. No matter what obstacles they have to overcome. It takes determination, dedication, and love to get through it all.

Good luck in your search of love and marital happiness.